The only thing that runs through your mind after a fresh break up is your ex bae (or in some cases bae). The reason I said bae is because some of us are or have been in traffic light relationships. You don’t know whether the red light is permanent or just holding up traffic for a while. The amber light might make you want to cross the road to make things work. Who knows, it might change back to a green light and this could be a temporary break up…
But right now you’re hurting and feeling lovesick as literally everything around you is reminding you of your ex. From the T-shirt hanging in your wardrobe to your new phone case he bought you last week. How do you heal from this?
In this blog, I’ll be touching on four ways that will help you get over your ex and heal from the pain. I’ll be writing in the girl’s perspective so guys just place your feet in my shoes for a minute.
Stay Away From Slow Jams!
Ne-Yo said it best when he sang: ‘And I’m so sick of love songs, so tired of tears…’ Listening to love songs or baby-making music like Lost Without You by Robin Thicke or Maybe I Should Call? by K. Michelle just doesn’t help right now. It’ll just make you sad and bring your mood all the way down.
Instead of listening to R & B, why not listen to other genres for a while? I remember when I stopped myself from listening to EVERY song that reminded me of my ex when I went through a break up a few years ago. I ended up listening to a lot of AfroBeats, Hip-Hop and Dancehall songs. You can’t go wrong with listening to upbeat music that makes you want to dance instead of cry your eyes out.
Stop Talking About Your Ex!
After a break up, your ex becomes Voldemort from Harry Potter. He’s now referred to as ‘He Who Must Not Be Named’. So tell all your friends to stop talking about him! It doesn’t matter whether they bumped into him on their way to your house; they still shouldn’t bring up his name. Talking about him opens a can of worms that you’re not ready to deal with as the break up is still fresh…
Delete Or Archive All Conversations!
Scrolling through old conversations can take your mind on a trip… You start reminiscing about the good ol’ times with bae *sigh*. I don’t know how men are when it comes to WhatsApp conversations, but that’s one thing girls like to hold on to. When a girl deletes a WhatsApp conversation, it either means she’s completely done with the situation or she’s ready to move on. I won’t lie to you, deleting the conversation is extremely hard so I get it if you’re not ready to do that. But why don’t you start off with archiving the chat so you don’t have to see his name come up every time you go on WhatsApp?
Don’t STOP Your Life For Your Ex!
It’s very easy to lose yourself when you go through a break up. It can interfere with your daily routines. For example, instead of going to the gym or going to dance class, you could end up throwing yourself a pity party by staying in bed all day with multiple tubs of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream. That might make you feel better in the moment but as soon as that tub is done, you’ll start reminiscing again… Going through a break up is tough but you can’t stop your life because of this. Don’t get me wrong, it’s absolutely okay to be upset but just don’t dwell on it for too long. You have to get on with life so don’t let the break up BREAK YOU!
I can go on for years talking about break ups and heartbreaks… But the best advice I can give you is to stay away from all the things that make you think of your ex. That’s the best way to heal from the pain. And yes, that can also include deleting them from all social media platforms and blocking and deleting their numbers if you’re ready to do that. Hang in there and give yourself time to heal. Don’t worry, you can get back to listening to the finest R &B songs in no time but for now you have to do what’s best for you. It will all get better in time, I promise.
Sugars and love,